Archive Page 2

GEORGE W. BUSH RETURNS TO HIS NATURAL HABITAT

jackass-georgeYes, Jackass George has returned to his home state of Texas,  where he received a warm hero’s welcome by the many subhuman redneck primates who reside there.  Apparently, they all enjoyed the eight years of his systematic dismantling of America.   Good ol’ Jackass will now spend his time grazing on his ranch in Crawford, with his crosseyed mate Laura by his side.  Yes,  Jackass George is now just a private citizen,  with taxpayer supported security staff,  taxpayer supported health care, and taxpayer supported retirement.  All the little luxuries of life that Republicans have always told Americans they cannot have, and should not want.  Yes, we are so lucky here in America to have hypocrites like Jackass George and the rest of the Republican party to lead us.  So lucky.

HYPOCRITE LIMBAUGH HOPES AMERICA FAILS!

It’s no secret Republican airbag Rush Limbaugh hates Democrats.  And Democrats hate Limbaugh in return.  Today on Limbaugh’s radio show, the conservative blowhard made headlines by openly saying that he “hopes Obama fails”.   This after all the warm and fuzzy commentary by all of the news media during the Obama inauguration about “one America”,  and the power of Obama to “unite” the country and work bi-partisan with Republicans.  

You see, because of people like Rush Limbaugh, there can never, and WILL never be “one America”.   Because conservatives always have, and always will view the world with a “Us versus Them” mentality.   It was the hallmark of the Bush administration’s approach to everything for the last eight years.  And it is the way conservatives WANT the world to be.  They WANT enemies at every turn.  Why?  So they can flex their muscles,  declare the opposition “evil”,  and then feel self righteously “holy” by launching a war like campaign to destroy the perceived “evil”, thereby proving to themselves  (and God) that they are the protectors of all that is “right”.  My how their inflated egos must tickle with joy every time they indulge in such a fantasy.  

So Rush “The Windbag” Limbaugh openly states that he hopes Barack Obama, the legally and lawfully elected president of  The United States of America,  Limbaugh’s own home country, fails.   Does anyone happen to remember the conservative outrage that was vented over the claim that ANY American who protested against the war in Irag was “hoping that America fails”?   Republican airbags like Sean “The Idiot”  Hannity railed daily, expressing outrage that ANY American would be so “evil” as to actually HOPE that America would fail!  Well,  let’s see if conservative outrage targets Limbaugh in the same manner, because when Limbaugh says that he hopes Barack Obama fails,  he is essentially saying the same thing;  that he hopes America fails! 

Something tells me windbags like Hannity,  Bill “Bozo” O’ Reilly, and the myriad other conservative idiots out there will most likely brush over Limbaugh’s comment without mention.  Why?  Because in actuality, they are ALL hoping that Obama fails, or at least screws up in some manner.  Because to conservatives there isn’t,  and can never be, “one America”.  One America would mean that they might not have the power to crush the “evil” opposition that disagrees with their agenda.  One America would mean that people who they do not believe should be allowed to be heard, might actually be able to exercise their “freedom of speech”.  One America would mean that all of those in the middle class who work to enrich and empower the wealthiest corporations might actually be entitled to “handouts”, otherwise known as benefits.  Yes,  if Rush “The Windbag” Limbaugh and other conservative hypocrites have their way, there will never be “one America”.

WHAT THE HOLIDAY SEASON IS REALLY ALL ABOUT

Well,  here we are in the middle of another holiday season.  Even though the current economic slump has put a damper on some of this year’s celebration,  people still find a way to indulge in their most favorite holiday activity:  getting fat and drunk.   Does anyone seriously believe that if food and alcohol were removed from the equation that people would still celebrate ANY holiday?   I don’t think anyone would even care what new year it was, or anything at all about “Old Saint Nick” if they couldn’t load themselves full of pastries and booze.  So spare me the  “Holiday Wishes” and the spirit of “The Season”, because the reality is holidays are about one thing and one thing only:  getting fat and drunk!  Sure, children enjoy the holidays because they get a break from  school,  and they can bug their parents into buying them the latest x-box crap, but adults only see one thing appealing in all of the holiday madness, and that is the opportunity to eat too much and drink too much.   As someone who doesn’t drink or eat very much,  I find the lack of dignified self control among my fellow humans during the holidays to be transparently ridiculous.  Oh sure,  I’m told to “get into the holiday spirit”, or “lighten up” (hilarious),  or to “live a little”.  All of these slogans become laughable when all of the morons who spew them discover they have gained 10 unwanted pounds after their drunken,  hung over festivities.  Yes, there’s nothing like polluting your body to demonstrate how to “live a little”!  So as the new year begins, last year’s holiday revelers will regain consciousness,  and begin new diet regimens and workout routines.  All in preparation for the next holiday season when they can get into the spirit again, and indulge in the most festive of holiday traditions;  getting fat and drunk!  Bah Humbug!

MORE STUPIDITY FROM FANATICAL IDIOTS

al-qaidaHere is Al-Qaeda’s No. 2 man,  Ayman al-Zawahri.  If ever there was a poster boy for stupidity it would have to be this low life jackass.  Judging by the two blank craters that pass for his eyeballs it’s easy to see that there’s nobody home inside his empty cranium. 

This idiot appears on a video tape “leaked” to Arab TV by the terrorist group in which he refers to Barack Obama as a “House Negro”, and goes on to say that American foreign policy will not change under the new administration.  Al-Zawahri babbles the usual fantatical  nonsense throughout the video, inciting more violence against western civilization, while making a complete ass out of himself  in typical terrorist fashion.  

It’s easy to dismiss this living garbage bucket as your average run of the mill lunatic, but on closer analysis, there’s more here to be learned. Particularly, this is a perfect example of what happens when you mix religious fanaticism and politics.  This is a perfect example of what happens when you have a culture that sees a religious significance behind every political issue or idea.  This is a perfect example of what religious fanaticism can become if you have a population that is so uneducated that they cannot distinguish between reality and mythology.  This is what happens when you have a religious culture that insists on keeping people’s minds frozen in the superstitions of the ancient past. This clown, and others like him, practice their fanaticism in the middle east.  In America, we have Pat Robertson and the religious right.   Robertson once attempted to become President of The United States in order to impose right wing christian fundamentalist laws.   Different geography,  same fanaticism,  same dangerous primitive stupidity.

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL DENNIS MILLER TO SHUT THE HELL UP?

dennis-millerOnce hip Saturday Night Live cast member Dennis Miller now spends a majority of his time making the rounds on conservative talk shows, spewing his weak attempt at witty, conservative infested political commentary .  Miller frequently appears on Bill “Bozo” O’Reilly, and after about 15 seconds of listening to him blow hot air I’m wishing someone would surgically remove his whiny, annoying vocal chords.  It’s obvious that when Miller is given a written script by professional comedy writers he can pull off a reasonably competent performance,  but when left to his own creative urges he becomes a complete babbling idiot!  Of course, the O’Reilly show is the perfect sewer for someone of Miller’s weak talents to wallow in, and it’s no surprise that he’s found a friend in Bozo Bill.  After all,  Miller failed miserably on Monday Night Football several years ago, and he hasn’t had a successful movie or TV show to speak of EVER.  O’Reilly’s bombastic, intelligence challenged style is a perfect match for Miller’s pea sized brain.  So here’s one for ya Denny boy, written just for you babe; The unequaled ineloquence of your dissertations is about as impressive as a Pygmy trying to re-invent the concept of cerebral magnanimosity.  You stupid moron!

FOX NEWS GETS EVEN MORE UNFAIR AND UNBALANCED

Well, it’s official.  Glenn “Blank Eyes” Beck, the newest moron on the right wing block, is leaving CNN to join forces with the world’s largest collection of right wing morons at FOX news.  As if FOX doesn’t s-glenn-beck-largealready have enough right wing airbags as it is, heck, what’s one more, right?  I’m sure that even with the acquisition of Blank Eyes Beck, FOX loudmouths such as Sean “The Idiot” Hannity will continue to blow air about how FOX presents   “both sides” of the story.  Oh yeah,  let’s see,  they do    have left winger Alan Colmes, who gets run over more times than a dead pigeon, and they have…..well,…. they have Alan Colmes!  So the world’s most biased TV news network welcomes Glenn “Blank Eyes” Beck to their stuffy little, narrow minded,  arrogant,  ignorant,  one dimensional,  twisted,  unfair and unbalanced world.  I’m sure he’ll fit right in.

Recently, while appearing on the Greta Van Susteren show on FOX,  Blank Eyes Beck told the gut wrenching tale of an encounter he had at a fast food shop with a customer who recognized him, and began yelling and cursing at him in front of everyone in the shop,  saying something to the effect that it’s right wingers like him who are destroying America.  Beck, seemingly horrified by the event,  then said to Van Susteren “My God, is this what we’ve come to?”  Does Beck really believe that commentators like himself,  Sean “The Idiot” Hannity,  Rush “The Windbag” Limbaugh, and all of the other rabble rousing, fear mongering, hate mongering conservative loudmouths out there can actually go on the airwaves everyday and spew nonsense without any backlash whatsoever from the public?  During this past presidential election, Beck and his conservative cohorts did their best to paint Barack Obama as an anti-American terrorist.  Where was his, and other conservatives outrage when Republican voters made threatening remarks like “Kill Obama”,  and “Bomb Obama” as a direct result of conservative commentator’s smear tactics?   For Beck to express outrage over confrontational remarks made to him at that fast food shop only goes to show that conservatives are fine with inciting potential violence against those they dislike,  but when it’s directed at them they are shaken and ask “My God, is this what we’ve come to?”  Yes Mr. Beck,  thanks to you and all of the other loudmouth conservative windbags out there,  this IS what we’ve come to.  I hope you enjoy reaping what you’ve sown.

KANYE WEST: THE MORON OF A GENERATION

kanye-west1Earlier this week, Pop/R&B star Kanye West proclaimed himself  “The voice of this generation”.  He also managed to get more bad PR by having an altercation with a paparazzi outside a nightclub.  Over the last few years, Kanye West has shown that he has extremely abundant talent when it comes to arrogance and ignorance, whether it’s throwing tantrums after losing at awards shows, or making ridiculously conceited statements.  Is West a talented singer and musician?  Of course.  Does he have the ability to sell a lot of hit recordings?  Certainly.  Is he an arrogant jackass?  Completely.  The one aspect of music history that West is apparently ignorant of is the fact that legends, no matter who they are or when they exist, can only be anointed as such by the hand of Time as it slowly passes along through history, and eventually reveals who is worthy of legendary status.  No artist, not in music, film, or any other medium, can officially proclaim themselves as relevant or important in any way to any period of time.  Yet, Kanye West believes that if he proclaims it,  then it is so.  A few years ago,  West said in an interview that the reason he didn’t win at an awards ceremony was because “they don’t realize who I am”.  He added a proclamation that he’s here to take music to “the next level”.  But so far his music doesn’t sound much different than most other performers.  Arrogance has been a common trait in the entertainment business ever since the industry first began.  So far, if Kanye West is leaving any sort of  historical mark on the music business at all, it’s undoubtedly as being the most arrogant and conceited artist of all time.


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"All the knowledge in the world is of no use to fools"
- EAGLES, Long Road Out Of Eden

If morons could fly, the skies over America would be pitch black!

The 3 lowest forms of life (in order of intelligence)

1. Bacteria
2. Rednecks
3. Republicans